tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41621707543933450322024-03-12T20:52:40.102-05:00The Hot Mess ExpressLife is hard. So is being a mom.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.comBlogger195125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-74523521003390524822015-04-22T16:18:00.000-05:002015-04-22T16:18:07.270-05:00Building A VillageNext month marks 3 years that I have officially been a Nevada resident. There have been ups and downs and all arounds, but it finally feels like it's OK.<div>
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Mostly because of the village we've built. When circumstances change, and you have to go outside of your comfort zone (and outside of the tri-state area where 90% of your friends and family lives), finding people who are there for you makes all the difference in the world.</div>
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Today, as I was answering e-mails and text messages, I came to the realization that we've got a whole lot of people here in Vegas who have our backs. They are the family that stands in when ours is so far away. They are important to us, and they are super special because they are the family we got to choose.</div>
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My friend Rose is always looking out for things that our son Sam loves, and she was travelling today and sent me pictures of Southwest airplanes for Sam to see. She even said she would try and get some Southwest swag from one of the flight attendants. :) She's the same friend who knew of Sam's love of signs, and went to her city engineer friend and got Sam some real street signs to hang in his room. Sam is one of the only people who gets to call her Miss Rosie. She is a treasure and a gem.</div>
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Our friends Marty and Mel, Cammie and Jim are special to our kids, too. They have watched them grow, and tease them, and indulge in everything they are interested in. They would give us the shirt off their back, and are always willing to help if needed. We've spent Christmas and other holidays with them, when we were all unable to be with our families. We make plans on weekends and drop off soup/smoothies when they are ill. They make fun of me and know I drink wine out of a Thermos at the park on Sundays. They accept me for my crazy.</div>
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Rebecca and Norm have become an extended part of our family. They are Aunt Rebecca and Uncle Nor-man. Their kids and my kids play together, like cousins. We vacation together and can talk about anything from politics to Lady Gaga. The kids have sleepovers together and we call each other in a pinch. We help raise each other's kids. Rebecca is my best friend, and we are sad if we don't see each other at least once a week. They accept my kids for their quirks, and love them like their own.</div>
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This is just a sample of the village we've built here. For the first time, I feel like if we ever left Las Vegas, I would be sad, and we would have an entire group of people who we would miss and who would miss us.</div>
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Friendship is a wonderful gift, and I am so, so glad that we found these people. Happy Vegas-versary to us. </div>
Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-18735598362040369922014-05-15T21:11:00.001-05:002014-05-15T21:11:19.007-05:00Flippin' out.<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302947998px; line-height: 20px;">It's 5 o'clock, I've got a meatloaf in the oven, and my kids are moments away from being sold to the nearest gypsies. I pull out the meatloaf to baste it, catch the edge of the pan *just right*, and flip the entire thing over on the counter.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302947998px; line-height: 20px;"> Instead of starting over, I just scoop it up into a loaf pan and throw it back in the oven. </span><br />
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<br />Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-17082654240496512632014-03-31T23:22:00.002-05:002014-03-31T23:22:58.407-05:00New FrontiersOn August 8, 2007, my life changed forever. Our Sam was born. But, if I am being honest, my life changed on May 12th, 2007, when my obstetrician told me that my new job was to lay in bed all day and focus on bringing a healthy, full term baby into the world. My boss knew that I was thinking about becoming a stay at home parent, and Sam's scary pregnancy and our previous losses only bolstered my decision. On May 12th, I took my doctor's note to my boss, cried in her office, and then packed up and left my position as a scientist for a position as incubator.<div>
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Fast forward to 2014, and things are beginning to look as scary as they did that day in May when I turned my world upside down. Sam now has a sister, and in the fall of this year, both children will be attending school. For the first time in 7 years, I have entire afternoons and mornings to myself.</div>
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It goes without saying that I've hardly gone without a job for the past 7 years, it's just that my job has looked a whole lot different than I envisioned when I was in college. I gave up petri dishes for potty dances, and paychecks for hugs. We've thrived as a family with one income, mostly due to good budgeting and my husband's hard work.</div>
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I feel sad that my official job for the past 7 years is sort of "over." My kids don't need someone to change their pants and feed them and rock them anymore. They can get their own milk and cereal and make their own waffles and go to school. They are becoming self sufficient humans, and I am so proud, but so paralyzed by the new options presented for me.</div>
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With both kids in school, I'm in a weird transition period. I still want our family to have the niceties of having a parent at home. I want to pick them up, and be involved with their schools, and make dinner and bitch about being the only one that cleans. But, the thought of being able to use my college education and contribute financially to our household is appealing as well. </div>
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I know that whatever decision I make, I have the full support of my husband. I just wish I knew what it was I wanted to do now that my babies aren't babies anymore.</div>
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Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-82336910873090904132014-02-26T15:09:00.000-06:002014-02-26T15:09:35.247-06:00Let's Get Up To Speed, Shall We?Last time I left off, I was fresh off an ACL replacement surgery and a move across town. Things settled down...sort of. :)<br />
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So pretty.</div>
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Sam started 1st grade at Twitchell Elementary school. He is in Ms. Kessler's SLD program, and I am proud to say he is now doing great. He can read, his writing has improved 100%, and he is making friends. It makes me happy.</div>
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Sloane also started school. She takes Pre-K classes at the Henderson Multi-generational Center. This week, I also received her Kindergarten enrollment package. (insert sobbing "where did my baby go" dialogue here) She's also quite the little ballerina, and participated in her first recital in December.</div>
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Johnny celebrated another birthday. He's still the news editor for local news at the Las Vegas Sun newspaper. Because of his job, we get to do some pretty cool "not in Kansas anymore" stuff. It's been fun! There is a lot to do in and around Las Vegas, and of course the weather is awesome.</div>
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Opening of Hakkasan nightclub</div>
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Red Rock Canyon hike</div>
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First family UNLV Rebels game</div>
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Las Vegas Weekly anniversary party at the Tropicana's Havana Room</div>
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Christmas at Bellagio</div>
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The kiddos with Gregory Popovich at his comedy pet theater.</div>
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I celebrated an anniversary of my 25th birthday, too.</div>
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We had some wonderful friends and family in town to visit.</div>
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Aunt Treece and Lolo came to visit. Sloane and Sam (and mom and dad) were so happy!</div>
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Sam and Rachel on our tour of gluttony.</div>
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My childhood besties with John and I at the Welcome to Vegas sign.</div>
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Things here have been good. We love our new smaller house, and the kids love their school. I'm rehabbing my knee and preparing to run my first post-injury 10 K in the early summer.</div>
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We are excited to take trips back to the midwest this year for a family wedding and just for fun! The kids got to visit the ocean for the first time in January, when we took a weekend trip to San Diego.</div>
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That's pretty much a wrap. I'm excited to share some of the fun and weird and hilarious tales of our fam in the coming months. Stay tuned. :)</div>
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Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-22537425249846275502013-08-28T19:44:00.000-05:002013-08-28T19:44:26.394-05:00Once Upon A Time......there was a girl. She was an ambitious girl, who hated hearing she couldn't do something. Being told she can't do something is almost a dare to her (as her many friends can attest to), and some of the times, she ends up in quite the pickle.<br />
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This ambitious girl loved softball, and decided that after a 5 year hiatus, that the adult coed league was going to be a perfect and fun and safe activity for her 30 something ass. She tagged up on 2nd after an infield fly ball, and...well...never made it to third.<br />
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She tore her ACL. In half. She's a dumbass. So she had surgery. She's still attempting to recover by going to physical therapy 3 times a week and crying. She realizes that she is not 20 anymore. Her husband takes much delight in this, as it is what he has been trying to tell her the entire softball season.<br />
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The same month, her realtor asked her if she wanted to sell her house for a lot more money than she paid for it. The idea of being out of debt was really appealing to the girl, so she also agreed to that. Her house was on the market for 4 hours before it had multiple offers. The girl, she lives in a crazy part of the country with a crazy real estate market. The buyers waived all inspections and wanted to close fast. The girl found a new house to live in (a rental), and helped her husband pack and move a 5 bedroom house, 2 kids, and 2 dogs. 2 weeks after having her ACL replaced with a zombie's.<br />
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She also threw a birthday party for her 6 year old son and entertained out of town friends during this span of 4 weeks. <br />
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What a crazy fairytale!! Oh wait. It isn't. In our house, we just called it "August." :)<br />
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This girl is tired, and looking forward to a much more peaceful and quiet September. And maybe not walking with a limp.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-300003758657881582013-07-09T14:40:00.000-05:002013-07-09T14:40:14.095-05:00Mom GuiltAs most of you know, our son has autism. Since his diagnosis almost 3 years ago, my husband and I have poured ourselves into getting Sam every intervention and therapy on the face of Earth. I took classes and learned to do some of his therapies, took classes on how to deal with behaviors of Autism, etc. If there was a class, or a scientific study, or a research available, I learned it and tried it. I'm proud to say that our intense intervention with Sam has paid off in leaps and bounds. He's happy, he's thriving, and life is pretty good right now.<br />
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I forget sometimes that we have a younger daughter too. We've spent so much time and effort getting Sam the early intervention to thrive in the future, that we haven't done a whole lot to make sure our daughter thrives, too. I can't remember the last time I got the flashcards out to teach Sloane. The letter puzzles got tossed in our move. Where are the BOB books? Who knows.<br />
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This became blatantly apparent this morning as Sloane and I were practicing our alphabet. She is still not recognizing all of the letters, and sometimes we have trouble with counting. I am feeling like a total slacker mom right now! Sam could do all of this stuff by her age! I feel like I've failed her.<br />
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But then I remember the things that she can do that her brother can't. She can diffuse a situation using big, adult words and not the words that most 4 year olds use. She shows a compassion for her brother. She understands him without having to ask what is wrong. She drags him along with her and insists that he participates in whatever group activity is going on. She pushes Sam to be social. She can get herself dressed and brush her own hair and brush her own teeth. She is pretty much amazing.<br />
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So, yes. My daughter is 4 and stares blankly at the letter T. But you can teach letters in school. Compassion, on the other hand, is something that isn't easily taught. Perhaps I've done a better job with her than I think I have.<br />
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(and yeah, I'm going to start doing a better job of having a preschool hour in the house. Just sayin', some things are way more important).Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-54879682105119688312013-06-30T17:23:00.000-05:002013-06-30T17:23:39.133-05:00Long Time Gone...But I Choose Happiness.In January, I promised a good deal of you that I would write again regularly. It was my New Year Resolution.<br />
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Yeah, well resolutions are made to be broken, and sometimes life gets in the way.<br />
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Our move to Nevada has been hard. A lot, lot, lot stinking harder than I ever thought it would be. We've dealt with the usual "new surroundings" stuff, but I've also had a harder than usual time making friends. The kids have had a harder-than-I-could-have-imagined time adjusting to the weather, and a new house, and "why can't we just go see Aunt Jessi and Sammah and Aidan and I MISS THEM." My husband moved around much of his school aged life, and even he said that this move was one of his hardest. I could write an entire book on how hard it was for me to leave Lawrence. Needless to say, I haven't felt particularly funny or had anything that I considered exciting and fun to write about. I sat at home a lot, we tried to discover the city on weekends when Hub was home, but mostly we just existed.<br />
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And then, my mama came to visit. And I told her how hard it was and that I hated it and why cant I just come home with you? And, instead of saying "Yeah! You should! Let's do it!", she said something different. She told me that even life in Larrytown would have changed had I stayed. The close friends I have there have children of their own, and they all go to different schools and like to do different things. They are all growing up, which means we all would spend less time together and more time chasing our children's dreams. Our families are also doing the same stuff--my brothers and sisters have kids and are more busy now, which means less time on weekends to get together. Same for John's family. Same for my friends' jobs' and things they are passionate about. <b>"Lindsey, life is constantly changing. How you choose to deal with the change is what makes life exciting, and fun, and worth living."</b><br />
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I really enjoyed my time with my mom, and I bawled like crazy when she left. But her words hang in the air around here, and have left marks on my heart. And so, I started trying to look at Las Vegas as an exciting time in our life, and not a sad lonely place where we don't know anyone. I started inviting people I have met to do things, and they said yes! I began embracing the crazy and weird and madly interesting city I live in. Before, I'd just assume there was no sense of community here, and now I seek it out. It's made all the difference in the world.<br />
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I still love Kansas and my family and I always, always will. If there comes an opportunity for us to get closer to home, we will probably take it. But for now, I've chosen happiness here in this strange city. It doesn't quite feel like "home" yet, but who knows. Maybe someday it will.<br />
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And now, he's some photos of some of the fun things we've done since I changed my perspective. :)<br />
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The kids and I at the Bellagio Conservatory celebrating Chinese New Year. That picture is made of only flowers.</div>
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Sam and Sloane meeting Gregory Popvich, who does Pet Comedy Theater at Planet Hollywood. </div>
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Delicious beers at Hofbrauhaus.</div>
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After hours cocktail party with the men of Chippendales. Holy hot mans.</div>
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My time to shine at the Terry Cavaretta Trapeze Experience. It. Was. Awesome.</div>
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Trapeze with new friends. It was a fantastic time!</div>
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Our family, June 2013, Bellagio Conservatory.</div>
<br />Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-89695511654638983042013-02-04T23:17:00.003-06:002013-02-04T23:17:54.341-06:00Stand Up DateThere is nothing I love better than laughing. Paired with a date night with your spouse, it has the makings of a hilariously fun evening.<br />
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Hubs and I are giant nerds, and we used to spend every night watching "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" with Drew Carey and company. When Drew came out with his new Improvaganza show in Vegas, John and I tuned in from our couch in Lawrence, and laughed and joked that it would be SO COOL to be on that show.<br />
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Well, life is funny. :) Now that we live in Vegas, we have access to all sorts of cool shows and stuff. In, January, I saw a billboard advertising that Drew Carey's Improvaganza show was coming back for a few special nights at the MGM Grand. Since 2013 is the year that John and Lindsey Do Crazy Stuff, I came home and talked to John about how we could make our Drew Carey wishes come true. Not only did we get seats, we got FRONT ROW seats. Yep, we're nerds.<br />
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The show was this past Saturday, and though it didn't start till midnight (because of David Copperfield being a fun hater), we had the best time. They took a few of my suggestions for things (one being the word "balls"), and the most hilarious and awesome thing was that John was chosen to go on stage to be involved in one of the skits. If you are nerds like us, and know anything about Whose Line, John was chosen to do sound effects. He did great, and I have never laughed so hard in my entire life. <br />
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We never thought in a million years that it would be possible for us to go watch Drew Carey live in Vegas, let alone that it's now the place we LIVE. A small nerdy dream of ours is now fulfilled!<br />
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Nerds unite. Do crazy stuff.<br />
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My next big 2013 crazy? Trapeze lessons. Yep. Only in Vegas.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-86200994092431195262013-01-18T12:27:00.001-06:002013-01-18T12:27:23.605-06:00Adventures in Home Buying; Or, Why I Drank So Much In 2012I was relatively silent on here about all of the adventures that our move to Nevada brought us. One of the biggest pains in the ass was the purchase of our Too Tan House. My husband has been a journalist for the better part of 25 years, and it really does take a lot for him to pull the "I'm with the press and will be documenting this catastrophic series of events" card, but our home buying process was so riddled with frustration and ridiculous things, that John felt compelled to pull his card. He figured that out here in the Land of Foreclosure, we were not the only people experiencing these kinds of problems.<br />
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<a href="http://www.lasvegassun.com/news/2013/jan/18/buying-home-beware-not-so-short-short-sale/">Here's his first person account of our not-so-short sale</a>:<br />
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I like that the caricatures give me a hot red dress and heels, and John more hair than he's had in 15 years. :)<br />
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<br />Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-88066390720950455582013-01-03T17:17:00.004-06:002013-01-03T17:17:58.098-06:00The Too Tan HouseOur new house here in the desert is lovely and beautiful, and is bigger and nicer than anything I ever thought I would ever afford here. If we were going to move to Nevada, we picked a great time;when housing was at the total bottomed out price. Hooray for that, at least.<br />
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The house is only 5 years old, and all but the kid's rooms and one bathroom are your standard issue tan. I really despise tan. To me it screams "Safe. Lazy. Meh." And I have about 2200 square feet of it. What should I do with it? I have pretty bold colored furnishings in the living and dining room, but other than that I feel like the rest of our shit is pretty tan, too. It fit well in our artsy deco house in Lawrence, but in this giant space of tan, it all blends in with everything. I hate it!<br />
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I've never fancied myself much of a decorator. I try and do things to rooms and they don't look bad, but I'm not exactly David Bromsted either. And so, I am going to put some pictures up and I want you guys to tell me what to do. I need ideas, and nothing will seem to crazy. :) Paint? Furnishings? Art? All of the above? Give me some feedback.<br />
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I am determined to make Las Vegas our home, and so I want to start with the place we spend most of our time. I'm excited to see what you all have to recommend.<br />
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Lots of tan and brown. Oh look, a read couch. Among the tan. Zzzzz.<br />
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Tan walls. Tan carpet. Tannish everything. Boring. (and an ancient weiner dog, for cuteness)</div>
<br />Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-87499162579070465632012-12-28T11:07:00.000-06:002012-12-28T11:07:23.990-06:00Resolutions 2013It's the end of the year, and so it's typical that we have New Year's Resolutions. You know, those things you write out and then scrap 2 weeks later. :) Well, I'm going to try my best to stick to mine, so I've set the bar pretty low. Hey, it's how I roll.<br />
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My first one is to lose weight. Yes. Typical resolution. Since our move to Nevada, I've gained about 15 pounds. Not too much, but not the direction I was wanting to go. And so, I joined Weight Watchers again, and am going to tell my personal trainer that it's time to kick it in to high gear...which means I will hate her. As long as hating her results in a sweet ass, I don't care.<br />
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My second one is to come to this blog and update more. 2012 was a jacked up year, plain as day. I spent 5 months away from my spouse, and another 6 living in the fresh hell known as Box Wonderland in the Weird Apartment Complex. I sold a house, bought another (after 8 f*cking months of waiting), moved 2 times, and spent the first holiday season of my life away from my family. It was a hard year...I mean, we learned a lot about what we can tolerate and what our breaking point is, but I am ready to close the chapter on Tumultuous 2012 and settle in to quiet regular suburban Hot Mess living.<br />
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Just to update on the family, Hubs is loving his new job, Sam is thriving in his new autistic kindergarten, and Sloane is excited about her dance school starting back up. The kids got new bikes and scooters for Christmas, so they are busy practicing and honing their skills. I've met a few new friends so the loneliness isn't quite as bad, though I miss the pants off of all my best people from the Midwest. I get to go back and visit in January though (alone!) so I am really excited.<br />
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Here's to hoping I can keep my resolutions for 2013. For those of you who love to read this, you can drop me a line or call and keep me honest, too. :) And, I hope that all of your wishes for 2013 are realized, too.<br />
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Happy Holidays, Happy New Year.<br />
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The Hot MessLindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-39427431677499080202012-09-26T21:56:00.001-05:002012-09-26T21:56:26.765-05:00Why I Could Never Home School...Samuel is in Kindergarten this year, and we were so excited that we finally had a school aged child. Oh, what to do with that whole 3 hours per day of free time??! You guessed it, I eat bon bons and read Us Weekly. :)<div>
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I think that Kindergarten has changed in the decades since I was enrolled. I remember Kindergarten being this really cool place with books and a tent! and a cooking station! and we got to learn about a new letter that was turned into a character once per week. Fast forward to 2012, and Kindergarten has CORE STANDARDS to meet. By the end of Kindergarten, the children are expected to not only know all the colors and letters and numbers, but to be able to write them and spell them, too. No super fun "Mr. T" week. No tents. This is some serious business, y'all.</div>
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My son is autistic, and though he has an obsession with numbers, letters, reading and counting, he hates to write. Despises it. Would rather go to the doctor than write his name. You can see where this presents a problem for us, as I am "the responsible parent" who has to help with his homework every night. I've taken many a class on ABA therapy, which is a standard for teaching autistic children new skills. We work for treats and movies and celebration. He writes a few letters, and we have a celebration. Sounds fun, eh?</div>
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<i>I'd</i> rather go to the doctor than to sit for hours every night and cajole him into sitting and holding a pencil. We do two work sheets and I feel like I need to go run or hit something. It pains me as much as it pains him when the 7 o'clock homework hour comes around. Homework packets? In kindergarten? WTF!</div>
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So what should I do? I guess I pop my xanax and tell him to pick up his pencil, and be ready to dole out the M&M's like he just revised a Steinbeck novel. If this is how the homework hour is going to go for the next 12 years of my life, I better get a better prescription and lots of candy. :)</div>
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Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-89188170670954646972012-09-25T13:49:00.001-05:002012-09-25T13:49:50.089-05:00No Place Like HomeFor the past 5 days, we spent a crazy fun, long weekend in Kansas. We crammed it all in...our ultimate experience (much like what people do in Vegas. Ha ha. Anyways...).<br />
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Friends, friends, friends. Kid friends. Mom friends. Bar friends. Lots o' friends.<br />
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Family, family, family. Hub's entire family was together for our nephews wedding. He's one of 8 brothers and sisters, so that is a huge undertaking that does not happen too often. I believe the last Hubs Mega Family Reunion might have been our wedding almost 7 years ago. I got to see my momma and dad, a few of my nieces and nephews, and sister in law. It was wonderful.<br />
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Free State Brewery! Kansas City Barbecue! Yello Sub! Delicious one-of-a-kind foods that I cannot get out here. It was amazingly delicious, and I enjoyed the heck out of it. My scale agrees. :)<br />
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Something weird happened though. I became....ready to go "home." It was the first time that I ever considered Las Vegas my home now. I do not live in Kansas....I live in Nevada. And as much as I dislike our current living situation (I lovingly refer to it as Cabrini Green West), I was ready to be back to our normal. Both kids missed school, I missed my gym, and we all missed our routine here. WEIRD, RIGHT?<br />
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Maybe this place finally is growing on us. It's promising! I'll take it as a positive. :)<br />
<br />Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-67975252400265524222012-08-15T15:07:00.001-05:002012-08-15T15:07:52.141-05:00It Finally Happened...Well, it took five years to happen, but today my son asked me the dreaded question: "Mom, can we go to Chuck E Cheese?"<br />
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God. Why! WHY! What makes that place so awesome? Chunky Cheese and it's ilk are my idea of Hell on Earth. I love good food, I love video games, I love child friendly places...but something about the conglomeration of all of those (minus the good food) with a dirty rat as a spokesperson just gives me the heeby jeebies.<br />
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I have learned that every parent has their own version of the "worst place ever." One of my friends has convinced his children that McDonald's is full of scary clowns. Now, at age 7, their oldest has never eaten McDonald's. Age seven and has never had a Happy Meal? That is bananas to me, who stuffed her kids with golden arches food as soon as they were old enough for a road trip. I understand that a lot of other parents don't mind Chunky Cheese. I raise my glass to you. I'd rather have a lobotomy.<br />
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And so, I told another of a multitude of Little White Lies. "Sam, that place has really gross food, and the people are scary, and it's loud. I don't think you would like it." (in my mind I was also saying "that disgusting rat costume hasn't been washed since 1984, and I'd rather eat a bike tire than a slice of their pizza).<br />
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Seriously. I am a food lover. I am a culture lover. We have taken our kids to some amazing places that a lot of adults wish they had access to. Yet, still, the urge to visit the Chunky Hell on Earth is strong. I thought I raised my kids better than that!<br />
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Kudos to the Chunky marketing team though...clearly you are doing something right.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-2589260170390564042012-08-07T23:34:00.002-05:002012-08-07T23:34:29.491-05:00Lucky FivesTomorrow, my boy turns 5. The tiny baby that I carried home from the hospital 5 years ago will go to kindergarten in 3 weeks.<br />
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I want to know where the years went! Where the time went! When my baby grew up. <br />
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I suppose he grew up before my very own eyes, and I am having an A ha! Moment!<br />
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Feeling nostalgic tonight, on the eve of my son's birth. The days are long but the years are short.<br />
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Happy birthday, Chupa Monster. Mom and Dad think you are the bee's knees.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-63033921537013960292012-07-05T00:49:00.000-05:002012-07-05T00:49:57.318-05:00Tales From Depression LandLas Vegas sucks. There, I said it.<br />
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Things here are hard for me. No friends. No family. Yada yada. You know what though? Remove yourself from everything you've ever known for 30 years. It is hard. I know there are new opportunities and people and fun stuff. But I still miss the bajeezus out of everything from home. Yes, my family is here, and we are all together. I also thing that last sentence is a crock of bullshit. My family is not here. My husband and kids are here, yes...but my family...the rest of my core that helped with all the crazy, was there for the ugly, or came for dinner, or joined you for a glass of wine, or just plain joined you while you folded laundry...are not here. They are all moving on with their lives...back home...not here.<br />
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I have been having a more difficult time than I ever imagined. I sort of hate myself for it. I am adventurous!! I am fun!! I like a challenge!!! Well, I already have a challenge in my almost 5 year old. I <i>am</i> fun. I <i>am</i> adventurous. But I live in a city that is an Adult play ground, and not a child's. Casinos and shows on the strip are SO FUN! If you are 18 and have a babysitter. My children are minors, and I have no sitter, unless you count PBS Vegas TV.<br />
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Depression has sunk in. It's something I have struggled with my entire adult life, and here it is again. Dark, and stormy, and full of futility and hopelessness. I'm being proactive though---therapists, taking my medicines, getting Sam lined up in the therapy/school department. It just feels like it isn't enough though. I am sad. Sad sad sad as I've ever been. I hate it. John doesn't know what to do. I don't know what to tell him to do. And so, I sit...every evening, while the kids and spouse are in bed, and question myself as to what I can do to shake this soon.<br />
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I hate it. I hate being and feeling completely alone on an island in the middle of the desert.<br />
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I'm slowly meeting people. I don't foresee myself feeling "settled" until we get into our house...hopefully in a few months. Foreclosures suck, too. Nevada, and Vegas, and foreclosures, and moving, and being lonely...sucks. I hold out hope that it gets better soon. That's really all you can do sometimes...I am not in control of anything except how I feel about things....and as long as I do my best to change what I can control, I can accept what I cannot control.<br />
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Depression in Vegas. Who'd have thunk it?<br />
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<br />Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-53652447548844809662012-06-07T17:35:00.001-05:002012-06-07T17:35:16.000-05:00One More Chapter From The "Mother Of The Year" BookTell me I am not the only one. Please.<br />
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It's been a shit-tacular week here. Just lots of behavior problems, sleep issues with everyone, and my spouse has been working a lot. I still have yet to meet a whole lot of people here, so the seclusion has been getting to me and I might be going a little bit cray cray.<br />
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Today, I took the kids to the complex swimming pool, much like I do at least 4 times per week. It was a beautiful 97 degrees and breezy, so I thought we would enjoy many hours splashing and expelling energy. Twenty minutes into it, the kids wanted to get into the hot tub. In the summer. In Las Vegas.<br />
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I tried to be reasonable, and said "10 minutes." So, I set my timer, and even gave the appropriate prompts for Sam. At the end of 10 minutes, he refused to get out. "No. No minutes. I'm staying." I calmly threw down the "count to three and then we go home" gauntlet. No dice.<br />
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So mama counted to three, and with every number announced, my blood pressure raised about 100 points. At three, I went to grab him, and he went to the middle. So I got in and got him, said "time to dry off" and put him on the concrete. He ran to the pool and jumped in, swimming to the middle.<br />
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Mama lost her shit. I got in, and dragged him to the side, and out of the pool. He kicked and screamed as I put his water shoes on him, gathered our things, and dragged him out of the pool area. I am pretty sure that most of the patrons enjoying the pool saw more of my chest then they had ever intended on seeing. I managed to say few words until he started laying on sidewalk instead of walking beside me. Then I freaked the F out.<br />
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Bad call in the autism book, bad call in the parenting book, bad call all around. But he pushed my last freaking button, and I was done.<br />
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I basically dragged him home, along with a pool bag and another 3 year old who was pissed at her brother for "ruining everything again."<br />
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So now, I've turned on the TV, locked myself on the patio, and am currently drinking straight vodka out of a high heeled shoe. <br />
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A scene was caused today, but as Las Vegas and myself say, the house always wins kid. (Or at least we like to think we do. Shit, man. This sucks.)Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-23530869877212700892012-06-05T17:25:00.002-05:002012-06-05T17:25:25.254-05:00Autism Sucks.Autism sucks.<br />
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Sam's autistic behaviors have come to the forefront since we packed up our stuff and drove 23 hours to a new place. Thankfully, he was comfortable in "Daddy's apartment", but getting him to go anywhere else has been a lesson in patience and trust. Before we go anywhere, I have to announce what we are doing. "We are going to X, Y, and Z." If Sam approves, he is like Ok! Yeah! Let's go! If he does not approve, he kicks and hits and screams NO!! and repeats "No X! No X! No X! Sometimes X is a mundane "I need milk, we are going to the grocery store, kid." But, if he doesn't want to go, I either have to endure A: The shit fit of all shit fits on the way to X,Y or Z or B: Stay home and seethe anger at my anxiety riddled child. Most of the time we go with option A and bring a big dose of patience, but since I am also new here, sometimes it just isn't worth it. I hate to admit it, but I am seething rage right now as I write this blog.<br />
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I'm losing my ever-loving mind. I know it isn't his fault. Still, I don't have girlfriends here that I can sit around a table with that have known him his whole life to tell me "he's going to be OK, you are all going to be OK. Now let's hug and toast how hard it is to raise children!" I have me, and my 3 year old daughter who thinks it is unfair that Sam's moods dictate our activities (I cannot say I blame her, as I feel the same way). Oh yeah, and my workaholic husband. <br />
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Sam cannot get into his developmental psychiatrist until the middle of July, and his regular pediatrician refuses to tinker with his medicines; he'd rather the psych handle it. Again, I understand. I just wish someone could throw me a bone with this kid right now.<br />
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Autism sucks.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-15812046567911887042012-05-28T20:34:00.003-05:002012-05-28T20:34:36.678-05:00Memorial Day. *Sigh*This weekend was a pretty good one, looking back on it. We discovered more of our new city, took the kids to the children's museum and Freemont Street, and spent lots of time sunning and splashing at the pool. Hubs and I spent a lot of time together just talking and re-learning to be married to each other again. All in all, good stuff.<div>
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But something was missing from our weekend. Camaraderie. The kids didn't splash and play with their bestest friends, and we didn't sit around The Flying Fork's pool chatting and laughing and eating and drinking and laughing and laughing and laughing with our friends. They had their wonderful inaugural pool weekend, and we missed out on it. The children often asked this weekend where Jessie or KatieJill or Johnny or Aunt Megan was, and it broke my heart to say "we don't live near them anymore."</div>
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We are looking forward to meeting people here, and I anticipate that as that happens, the kids won't ask so much about friends and family back home. However, for this first holiday for us away from everything that was normal on this weekend was just weird and sad.</div>
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I miss my peeps, and I miss laughing a lot. </div>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-40001359493960552952012-05-21T22:33:00.000-05:002012-05-21T22:36:31.423-05:00Nevada vs. Kansas. Pros and ConsSo, I have officially been a resident of Nevada for what now? Four days? I've been out exploring, shopping, buying stuff, and tooling around. Moving away from my totally awesome and fantastic life in Kansas has been terribly difficult for me, even though my family is now all together and all that jazz. In an effort to keep my face out of a quart of ice cream a day while slugging around in a pitted out t-shirt, I have been compiling a list of pros and cons to this drastic change in social life, climate, and region.<br />
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<b><u>Nevada Pros</u></b><br />
1.Um...yeah. I can see the strip from my house. And from Costco. And from Target. Adult playground is a literal 5 minute drive.<br />
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2. Produce prices are much cheaper here, believe it or not, and you don't pay taxes on food. Hey, I'm a stay home parent...and I love to grocery shop. It's akin to "50% off everything at Nordstroms" for those of you who don't cook.<br />
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3. YOU CAN BUY WINE AT THE GROCERY STORE!! AND FOR MUCH CHEAPER! "Honey, I need you to pick me up some yogurt, juice boxes, Bota Boxes, and broccoli on your way home. Thanks"<br />
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4. We can buy 100% more house here for the same amount of money. I feel bad for the folks who got hosed when the housing bubble burst, but I am also super excited about a house big enough for my family and guests to be comfortable.<br />
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5. <span style="background-color: magenta;">Cliche time!!!!!! </span><span style="background-color: white;"> The heat? It is dry. Like, you can go outside and walk around without looking like a wet dog in 10 seconds. No more 4000% humidity. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;">6. My husband is here. The kids missed him so much, and it makes me smile that they are so happy to be back with dad. I like it because I can get out of the house at night without paying someone 10 bucks an hour. Winning!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;">7. Five hours from the ocean and Disneyland. Tons of National Parks within a weekend drive. We's gonna do some 'splorin', kids.</span><br />
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<b><u>Nevada Cons</u></b><br />
1. Goes without saying, but I miss EVERYONE. My family, my friends, Downtown Dennis pushing his baby stroller down Mass Street while dressed as a cat. My heart hurts, I miss everyone so much. If I had magic powers I would bring them all here....hey! You know what? Lance Burton lives up the mountain from my new house, maybe I can take over a casserole.....<br />
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2. There is a law in Nevada against talking on your cell phone while driving. Yes, I know it is safer than careening down a highway while coffee talking, but do you realize how hard it is? Old habits die hard, and I have already plugged "Hot Mess Cell Phone Tickets" into our budget.<br />
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3. Astro-turf lawns. Really? Who though this was a good idea? WTF? It gets super balls ass hot, too. Just like the concrete. And your car. Hot plastic lawn...hawt.<br />
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4. Gasoline prices. Balls. Enough said.<br />
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5. Smog, and requisite smog checks. That beautiful haze in the distance? It isn't a mirage. It's pollution. And, because me and my SUV are part of that lovely cloud, I get to have emissions testing on my car every year when I renew my car tags. Kansas didn't have smog...the haze in the distance was cow fart.<br />
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6. Car Insurance prices. People here drive like bat shit crazy lunatics, and it is reflected in "holy shit, this is double!" car insurance.<br />
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This is just a small list, which I am sure will grow on both fronts as the weeks wane on. Pros vs. Cons for now are a draw. Break even. Not the best bet, but not a loser either.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-28101237814929612772012-05-20T17:23:00.000-05:002012-05-20T17:40:22.946-05:00Things I Learned While Trekking Across the U.S.Hello friends! Long time no see. The Hot Mess Express rolled into Las Vegas on Friday, and we've been busy getting settled in. It's weird to me that we are living in a place that Hubs and I used to go to for vacation...now we are here minus the plans to stay up until 3am rolling craps at MGM and drinking vodka sodas until we can no longer stand up. Today I went to the grocery store and Costco. Cuh-razy Vegas living, no?<br />
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Anyway, the process of packing up our life and schlepping it across the U.S. taught me some things. :)<br />
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1. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT let your husband be in charge of a moving company, or the packing process. Mine sent the contents of my entire kitchen from Kansas to our 12 cabinet temporary apartment here. So now, my already tiny apartment dining room has a beautiful wall of brown boxes marked "china" and "stemware" and "service ware". I do not plan to throw dinner parties in my two bedroom apartment Hubs. WTF? :)<br />
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2. Monitor the liquids consumption of your toddlers on the road. Sixty four ounces of water/juice/soda/Manhattans means that I am certain I have seen every truck stop bathroom from Kansas to Nevada. Every. Single. One.<br />
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3. In a pinch, Fiber One bars can pass as a candy bar for your family. But, they also pass as something else a bit later.<br />
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4. Pack for the apocalypse. The children's drawers of clothing arrived at the apartment, but my socks and underwear are somewhere in 2 storage units...or a trucker's suitcase. *shudder* Creepy! Anyhoo, thank baby Jesus for Target.<br />
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5. There is no forest in the Petrified Forest National Park. There are, however, really beautiful desert landscapes, and petrified wood. Don't ask my kids though, because they couldn't be bothered to get out and look at million year old rock formations and trees. They wanted to eat Cheetos and watch Mickey Mouse.<br />
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6.According to my 3 year old, Oklahoma smells like goats. She must have been asleep on the drive through New Mexico.<br />
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I feel like I am completely starting over with my life, and the life of my kids. Our first night here, we took the kids to a casino to eat at a buffet. Might as well get them off on the right foot, no?Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-38612467888477571122012-04-12T18:50:00.000-05:002012-04-12T18:50:57.830-05:00Best. Week. Ever.Welp, the stars aligned this week friends. Not only did we buy a house in Nevada, but we sold ours here! Woo to the freaking hoo! I was starting to think it would never happen.<br />
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The flip side of this is...well, I have to leave my town. I love it here. Best city in Kansas, hands down. Lawrence and Mrs. Hot Mess are synonymous with a lot of my friends and family, co-workers and bartenders. I am sick to leave...<i>but</i> there are way crappier places to have to relocate, no?<br />
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Ready or not, here we come. Soon. Like, in 4 weeks soon. EEKS!!!<br />
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Hold on. It's going to be a wild ride!!!!Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-18175174041026148742012-03-27T14:20:00.000-05:002012-03-27T14:20:42.658-05:00UpdateHi everyone,<br />
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Once again, I have slacked on this blog. I am sorry. And once again, I will give you all the quick update.<br />
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1. Our house is still on the market. Blerg.<br />
2. Said house needs foundation work, starting next week (as long as the rain holds off). Cha-ching. Do you hear that? It's the sound of my nest egg going up in smoke.<br />
3. Sloane turned 3, it was fun and her cake was awesome.<br />
4. Sam is still in therapy, though we are due to get a med check, since he is not sleeping and he's lashing out (mainly at me).<br />
5. John loves his job.<br />
6. Being a single parent sucks monkey nuts. Big time.<br />
7. Go KU. Final Four, baby.<br />
8. Being a single parent still sucks monkey nuts.<br />
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That's pretty much the short of it all. Things are busy here for sure.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-26151961773200959802012-03-02T12:00:00.000-06:002012-03-02T12:00:13.920-06:00Happy Friday!!!I am so looking forward to today. My husband comes back for a visit! (that is so weird to say...as in, we live here temporarily). I can hardly wait.<br />
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I'm pretty sure I'm going to tackle him in the terminal when I see him. We missed him sooooo much. It will be a fast and short weekend, but I'll take it.<br />
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Hooray!Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4162170754393345032.post-66755213374598818622012-02-21T17:58:00.000-06:002012-02-21T17:58:19.461-06:00I'm No Celebrity, But Get Me Out Of Here Nonetheless.I am a social person. Very. When I became a stay at home parent, it was SO HARD at first. What? I get to stay home all day hooked up to a milk machine with a tiny screaming baby? This is my life? It was a time of much transition for me. I've gotten better about not having to see people every day, but I would still consider myself more social than most.<br />
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Since my husband left for the desert a month ago, my social life has taken a very sharp nosedive. We are maintaining 2 homes and saving for the "big move" and all that jazz, so the awesome sitter that I have cannot be called at every dinner invite and Girls Night Out. It has been hard. My husband did a wonderful job of seeing the look of despair on my face certain nights, and was more than happy to say "why don't you go to Starbucks or call your friend to go get wine, darling?" And I was out the door before he finished the sentence. My children see this look and just scream louder for MORE CHOCO MILK PLEEEEZ MOM! <br />
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I am also really bad at asking for help from people. Family, friends, it doesn't matter. I have lived most of my life being the person who can juggle 12 balls in the air and not drop them. There are days lately that I feel like I am totally flailing and dropping multiple balls, and I am too proud to call and ask someone to watch the kids before I rip their darling faces off. <a href="http://sahmiam43.blogspot.com/2012/02/i-need-to-get-out-of-here.html">Though we are in different spots in our child rearing years, it is apparent that I am not alone.</a> I need to get out of here!<br />
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The problem is, it can be a vicious cycle. I need to get out, but I am so stressed and tired and frazzled and just plain depressed that I don't want to go anywhere. I don't want to call friends, or eat out, or go to the park. I want to sit here and cry about how freaking hard it is right now.<br />
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It isn't healthy. Tomorrow, I vow to get out, even if it's just to a friends to let my kids run and scream and destroy someone else's house (sorry Jessie). Maybe. Probably. I hope so.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15274711844172327003noreply@blogger.com1