Things I Learned While Trekking Across the U.S.

Hello friends!  Long time no see.  The Hot Mess Express rolled into Las Vegas on Friday, and we've been busy getting settled in.  It's weird to me that we are living in a place that Hubs and I used to go to for vacation...now we are here minus the plans to stay up until 3am rolling craps at MGM and drinking vodka sodas until we can no longer stand up. Today I went to the grocery store and Costco. Cuh-razy Vegas living, no?

Anyway, the process of packing up our life and schlepping it across the U.S. taught me some things. :)

1. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT let your husband be in charge of a moving company, or the packing process.  Mine sent the contents of my entire kitchen from Kansas to our 12 cabinet temporary apartment here. So now, my already tiny apartment dining room has a beautiful wall of brown boxes marked "china" and "stemware" and "service ware".  I do not plan to throw dinner parties in my two bedroom apartment Hubs. WTF? :)

2. Monitor the liquids consumption of your toddlers on the road.  Sixty four ounces of water/juice/soda/Manhattans means that I am certain I have seen every truck stop bathroom from Kansas to Nevada.  Every. Single. One.

3. In a pinch, Fiber One bars can pass as a candy bar for your family. But, they also pass as something else a bit later.

4. Pack for the apocalypse.  The children's drawers of clothing arrived at the apartment, but my socks and underwear are somewhere in 2 storage units...or a trucker's suitcase. *shudder* Creepy! Anyhoo,   thank baby Jesus for Target.

5. There is no forest in the Petrified Forest National Park.  There are, however, really beautiful desert landscapes, and petrified wood. Don't ask my kids though, because they couldn't be bothered to get out and look at million year old rock formations and trees. They wanted to eat Cheetos and watch Mickey Mouse.

6.According to my 3 year old, Oklahoma smells like goats. She must have been asleep on the drive through New Mexico.

I feel like I am completely starting over with my life, and the life of my kids. Our first night here, we took the kids to a casino to eat at a buffet. Might as well get them off on the right foot, no?

Best. Week. Ever.

Welp, the stars aligned this week friends. Not only did we buy a house in Nevada, but we sold ours here!  Woo to the freaking hoo!  I was starting to think it would never happen.

The flip side of this is...well, I have to leave my town. I love it here. Best city in Kansas, hands down.  Lawrence and Mrs. Hot Mess are synonymous with a lot of my friends and family, co-workers and bartenders.  I am sick to leave...but  there are way crappier places to have to relocate, no?

Ready or not, here we come. Soon. Like, in 4 weeks soon. EEKS!!!

Hold on. It's going to be a wild ride!!!!

Update

Hi everyone,

Once again, I have slacked on this blog. I am sorry. And once again, I will give you all the quick update.

1. Our house is still on the market. Blerg.
2. Said house needs foundation work, starting next week (as long as the rain holds off). Cha-ching. Do you hear that? It's the sound of my nest egg going up in smoke.
3. Sloane turned 3, it was fun and her cake was awesome.
4. Sam is still in therapy, though we are due to get a med check, since he is not sleeping and he's lashing out (mainly at me).
5. John loves his job.
6. Being a single parent sucks monkey nuts. Big time.
7. Go KU. Final Four, baby.
8. Being a single parent still sucks monkey nuts.


That's pretty much the short of it all. Things are busy here for sure.

Happy Friday!!!

I am so looking forward to today. My husband comes back for a visit! (that is so weird to say...as in, we live here temporarily).  I can hardly wait.

I'm pretty sure I'm going to tackle him in the terminal when I see him.  We missed him sooooo much.  It will be a fast and short weekend, but I'll take it.

Hooray!

I'm No Celebrity, But Get Me Out Of Here Nonetheless.

I am a social person. Very.  When I became a stay at home parent, it was SO HARD at first.  What? I get to stay home all day hooked up to a milk machine with a tiny screaming baby?  This is my life?  It was a time of much transition for me.  I've gotten better about not having to see people every day, but I would still consider myself more social than most.

Since my husband left for the desert a month ago, my social life has taken a very sharp nosedive.  We are maintaining 2 homes and saving for the "big move" and all that jazz, so the awesome sitter that I have cannot be called at every dinner invite and Girls Night Out.  It has been hard.  My husband did a wonderful job of seeing the look of despair on my face certain nights, and was more than happy to say "why don't you go to Starbucks or call your friend to go get wine, darling?" And I was out the door before he finished the sentence.  My children see this look and just scream louder for MORE CHOCO MILK PLEEEEZ MOM!

I am also really bad at asking for help from people. Family, friends, it doesn't matter. I have lived most of my life being the person who can juggle 12 balls in the air and not drop them.  There are days lately that I feel like I am totally flailing and dropping multiple balls, and I am too proud to call and ask someone to watch the kids before I rip their darling faces off. Though we are in different spots in our child rearing years, it is apparent that I am not alone.  I need to get out of here!

The problem is, it can be a vicious cycle.  I need to get out, but I am so stressed and tired and frazzled and just plain depressed that I don't want to go anywhere. I don't want to call friends, or eat out, or go to the park. I want to sit here and cry about how freaking hard it is right now.

It isn't healthy. Tomorrow, I vow to get out, even if it's just to a friends to let my kids run and scream and destroy someone else's house (sorry Jessie).  Maybe. Probably. I hope so.

A Day In The Life...

Our house is currently on the market.  Here's a typical day in my life these days.

-Wake up way too early, to feed, clothe and get kids to school. (Hubs always did the feed part, and I am no morning person)
-Schlep kid to school, scramble to run as many errands as I can before it's time for pick up. If I am lucky, I can get a work out in at the gym (HA HA HA).
-Come home, feed kids (again) and pick up house.
-Watch children destroy house before my eyes.
-Cry
-Pick up house again.
-Watch kids destroy house before my eyes.
-Start dinner
-Get phone call from realtor saying she wants to show the house at 6, and is that ok?
-Throw raw dinner in fridge, scramble to pick up house again.
-Load dogs, two kids, loveys into car.
-Drive to McDonalds to get kids happy meal while we drive around for an hour.
-Bring kids home for snack (feeding time again, you know)
-Watch kids destroy house before my eyes.
-Put kids to bed, say to hell with the mess, and pour 32oz. glass of wine.
-Stay up too late reading trashy books.

Repeat. :)

Valentine Hell

For most parents, holiday parties at school are a wonderful, fun thing that brings excitement and joy to children.

For me, it is hell.  Sam was worked up before we even left the house today. He kept saying we were going to a Valentine's party, which we were, but it was at his school. His school party. He didn't understand, so he was mad about it, thrashing and screaming, refusing to get dressed, etc.  He cried as I drug him into school with his treats and valentines, and hit me one last time before his para whooshed him away to get busy on something.

I'm told that he had a very good day at school, and was happy and singing and lovely.  I know this much about my son: if kids around him are excited and rambunctious, he has learned to internalize his anxiety and stress.

Well, take a guess as to when that anxiety and stress comes out.....at home.  Ever since he arrived home today, Sam has been a hot mess. He is disagreeable, angry, whiny, and awful. Today, I got the kids a heart shaped pizza from Papa Murphy's.  Things were going OK until he spilled his milk.  Keep in mind that we spill our milk about every day at my house, so it really isn't a big deal...oops, clean it up, back to usual.  Well today Sam was distraught. He threw his pizza, threw his still-half-full cup of milk at me, and charged his sister.  All because of milk.

I do not like to reward bad behavior, and so his milk and pizza were taken away.  Sam has to be disciplined differently than Sloane.  I will not tolerate him harming his sister, and though I am a bit grateful that he usually seeks me out to hit instead of a peer, I am also growing tired of being charged at.

I guess what I am saying is, something so happy and fun as a small holiday party at school can mean chaos for the rest of our day. I really love all things celebratory, but one thing in his schedule is interrupted, and the rest of the day goes to hell in a hand basket.  I know he's still learning to deal with things, and hopefully one day we can enjoy these little parties and activities in our life.  It's another check off the list of "things I was really looking forward to doing with my son, but didn't work out."

For now, Sloane and I put on our riot gear and wait out the storm.  It's not fair to her, it isn't fair to any of us. But this is the life of a family dealing with autism.

And now, I am off to find myself a xanax. Happy Valentine's Day everyone.