Kids Are Rough On Your Body

It isn't enough that the simple process of growing and bearing a child completely destroys your body, the kids keep messing it up after they are born, too!

As you know, Sloane gave me a broken nose and black eye a few weeks back after pile driving my face with a bottle of milk. Well, today, I was navigating Sam's bedroom that is littered with every toy known to man. I stepped sideways on one of those straight-from-hell Matchbox cars, and was down on the ground screaming obscenities faster than a speeding bullet. Holy hell, the pain.

So, here I sit, jacked up on Tylenol 3 and sporting a flippin' walking boot. But at least it is 100 degrees with 90% humidity. My friend Jeannene suggested I bling it out, and I'm actually taking it into consideration, seeing as nothing goes with shorts more than rhinestones and ribbons. :)

So, note to the rookie parents out there: The stretch marks will fade over time (if you're lucky), but that doesn't mean your kids won't find some other cool scar or hospital bill to give you for a lasting memory that you chose to bring them into the world.